Crab-Stuffed Salmon

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GBS Food Article


I often (not very often) find myself needing to cook outside my home base. A.K.A. I am trying to impress the ladies(y) at their(her) place.

Thus the gentleman chef is thrown into a position where he is going to cook, but is he not sure what ingredients the kitchen in question will have. I therefore submit to you this recipe which is exceedingly tasty, very easy, and requires condiments, spice, and tools found in every kitchen.

I am in no way trying to present this as the definitive salmon recipe, however it is nearly idiot proof, cheap, and can be completed in under 20 minutes, cooking time included! That leaves plenty of time for lovin....

I originally intended to entitle this, "How to Cook Like Pimp Without Really Even Trying", but my new years resolution was to be less lame.



  • 2 or 3 Salmon steaks
  • Can of crab meat
  • 4 tablespoons of extra virgin olive oil
  • Pepper
  • Salt
  • 6 Tablespoons brie
  • Optional: Dried Roesmary

Make the Stuffed Salmon


1) Select your steaks. Ideally, you want steaks about ¾" thick and slightly larger than your open hand. However, any size will work as long as it is thicker than 1/2". The ones I have here are a bit thicker and smaller than ideal. If they come in a larger hunk, separate into portion sizes.


2) Slice open the glory hole. You have two choices, you can cut a simple square pocket in the middle of the meat like I did or you can cut a small opening and pivot the knife inside to create a "hidden pocket" of crab that is not easily seen at first. Your call. Also, do not fuck your uncooked salmon steak. Bacteria man, this isn't sushi grade.


3) Rub the steaks down with olive oil on both sides, including the skin side. Add a pinch of salt and a pinch of pepper to the eatin' side and rub it in.


4) Open the crab meat and put it in a bowl. A note on canned crab meat. Canned crab meat is not as good as fresh crab meat. It is, however, one of the great hidden bargains at your local grocery store. That can cost $1.79 versus about $8 dollars for the same amount of fresh lump crab meat. If you live on the coast where you can get the fresh stuff cheap, go for it, for the rest of us canned crab meat makes a great alternative.


5) Now you want to shred the brie into the crab. What, you say? Shred brie? Those of you in the know will realize that brie is a soft cheese and therefore unshreddable....unless you freeze it first! Put about 4 tablespoons worth in the crab, more if you like brie, but do not overdo it, brie is powerful stuff. If you have it, you can also put some pine nuts in the mixture. Yummy!


6) Stuff the mixture into your salmon steaks


7) Put the steaks in SKIN SIDE UP on an oiled backing tray. Cook for 10 minutes per inch of thickness at 425 degrees. The meat will turn opaque pink when done.


8) Yarr....shitty picture of the now cooked steaks. These can be safely ingested now, but to ensure you get good deep throat action, you will want to broil the tops for aesthetic and texture reasons. Flip the steaks over and place the remaining tablespoon of brie on the top. Place this under the broiler for about 5 minutes, until you see the slightest hint of brown on the cheese.


9) Sprinkle the optional dried rosemary on top and enjoy! I recommend a Chardonnay or Chardonnay Reisling blend to ensure maximum swoonfulness in your hoe'.